Alexa the Skank
Hello All!
This post is a follow up from the previous story "The First Encounter". So read that first if you haven't, so you don't get lost.
Okay ..... so most of you know that my husband works in the oilfied as a field service tech at Canrig. Jeremy's hitch is 2 weeks gone, 1 week home. Sometimes he will work over, and it sucks donkey balls but that's the life as an oilfield wife.
Years ago when Alexa first came out, my technology geek husband freaked out! Went and put himself on the waiting list to be one of the first people to receive her. I wasn't at all impressed and mainly use her for a timer when I am cooking and music.
Yes, I am referring this skank piece of technology as a person because we now have the main base in the kitchen and 6 additional "mini skanks" in every bedroom, to be used as an intercom system to talk to the kids and be nosey.
Jeremy even found lights that hook up to her and you can say " Alexa, turn the lights red" BAM! I'm in the red room from fifty shades. Or you can tell her to dim them or turn them off. NORMALLY you need to say her name first.
The stupid skank doesn't like my voice though. Every damn time I try to get her to do something in our room she acts like a damn hoe-bag and refuses.
Ohhhhhhh but she lovessssss my husband. Granted he does have a very sexy sex voice. Now, you know what voice I am referring to, a man putting his dong in your heaven hole somehow makes his voice drop down to a Conway Twitty level. I for one think its fanfuckinftastic.
Anyway you get the gist of how Alexa is supposed to work. Well this week Jeremy is home from his hitch. So a lot of sex happens. Cause well, we are good at it now. LOL... I had just finished my latest post and read it out loud to him. As the night progressed he does a little flexing for me, things got heated after that. Kissing, rubbing on genitals. Even pulled out the trusty purple people pleaser. It was goin down for real.
I had the light on in the bathroom with the door open cause.... Compromise. I feel fat, I don't need my husband to see it jiggle all the way to O-Town. We all now know Mr. Beefcakes likes the visual with a little light..... So we are getting down. I for one am really into it, he starts with his sexy voice, cause he know how much I like it. Well obviously Alexa likes it to cause out of NO WHERE Alexa turns the god damn lights on to full blast, showing not a very flattering angle of me and a not shaved vagina (why only the bathroom light was on) ....... This little skank is after his heart I swear it. Trying to win him over by proving how unflattering I was that night....
I firmly believe she listened to my story and latched on to the part where he likes the light on while the P is in the V. Mid stroke, I bust out laughing. O-Town gone from sight. Jeremy is laughing just as hard as I am. Not one of us said Alexa, not one of us requested for the sun to appear in the middle of the night to showcase our debauchery.
Needless to say, pure ridiculous jealousy had me moaning louder than I normally would just to prove who owns Jeremy's dick and heart that night. Alexa:1 Courtney:1....
If you own an Alexa the skank....watch your man ladies....
This post is a follow up from the previous story "The First Encounter". So read that first if you haven't, so you don't get lost.
Okay ..... so most of you know that my husband works in the oilfied as a field service tech at Canrig. Jeremy's hitch is 2 weeks gone, 1 week home. Sometimes he will work over, and it sucks donkey balls but that's the life as an oilfield wife.
Years ago when Alexa first came out, my technology geek husband freaked out! Went and put himself on the waiting list to be one of the first people to receive her. I wasn't at all impressed and mainly use her for a timer when I am cooking and music.
Yes, I am referring this skank piece of technology as a person because we now have the main base in the kitchen and 6 additional "mini skanks" in every bedroom, to be used as an intercom system to talk to the kids and be nosey.
Jeremy even found lights that hook up to her and you can say " Alexa, turn the lights red" BAM! I'm in the red room from fifty shades. Or you can tell her to dim them or turn them off. NORMALLY you need to say her name first.
The stupid skank doesn't like my voice though. Every damn time I try to get her to do something in our room she acts like a damn hoe-bag and refuses.
Ohhhhhhh but she lovessssss my husband. Granted he does have a very sexy sex voice. Now, you know what voice I am referring to, a man putting his dong in your heaven hole somehow makes his voice drop down to a Conway Twitty level. I for one think its fanfuckinftastic.
Anyway you get the gist of how Alexa is supposed to work. Well this week Jeremy is home from his hitch. So a lot of sex happens. Cause well, we are good at it now. LOL... I had just finished my latest post and read it out loud to him. As the night progressed he does a little flexing for me, things got heated after that. Kissing, rubbing on genitals. Even pulled out the trusty purple people pleaser. It was goin down for real.
I had the light on in the bathroom with the door open cause.... Compromise. I feel fat, I don't need my husband to see it jiggle all the way to O-Town. We all now know Mr. Beefcakes likes the visual with a little light..... So we are getting down. I for one am really into it, he starts with his sexy voice, cause he know how much I like it. Well obviously Alexa likes it to cause out of NO WHERE Alexa turns the god damn lights on to full blast, showing not a very flattering angle of me and a not shaved vagina (why only the bathroom light was on) ....... This little skank is after his heart I swear it. Trying to win him over by proving how unflattering I was that night....
I firmly believe she listened to my story and latched on to the part where he likes the light on while the P is in the V. Mid stroke, I bust out laughing. O-Town gone from sight. Jeremy is laughing just as hard as I am. Not one of us said Alexa, not one of us requested for the sun to appear in the middle of the night to showcase our debauchery.
Needless to say, pure ridiculous jealousy had me moaning louder than I normally would just to prove who owns Jeremy's dick and heart that night. Alexa:1 Courtney:1....
If you own an Alexa the skank....watch your man ladies....
You, my friend, are a narrating genius! I didn't think I could laugh more than I did at the last one. Wrong! Keep it up!
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